3rd March 2010

Right now I am sitting at Johannesburg airport, just arrived from Bulawayo and on my way back to Cape Town in a few hours. I decided last week Wednesday at about 8pm that I had to come home for Joey's memorial... Well, not his memorial, but the Celebration of his life... I booked my ticket and flew the following morning at 6:30am, my poor boyfriend having to wake up soooo early and take me to the airport before work! I must say, I am very lucky to have such a wonderful man in my life... I think I am quite the pain sometimes!

I arrived in Joburg and spent the day with my wonderful Grandad and his wife Lynette, who is sadly a little unwell at the moment. Nevertheless it was great to see them again. I love spending time with my Grandpop, he is one of the most interesting men I know. I am so very grateful that I have had the opportunity to grow up and form a friendship with him. A true, solid friendship. My mum's mother died when I was only one year's old, and apparently she was a great lady, full of life, loved travelling, loved experiencing new things, loved cooking. My Grandad says I remind him a lot of her, which is a great thing to be told. Often the rest of my family wonder where I come from, because I am the wild child! Mum, it was your mum!!!

I was picked up on Thursday evening by some of Joey's South African friends, a lovely couple whom I got on so well with from the word go! Kerry and I sat up that evening until six the following morning, chatting and having a few toots! (A few too many perhaps!) It was wonderful, getting to know each other and reminiscing about our darling friend Joey. On the Friday we jumped into a mini van and drove all the way to Musina, near the Beit Bridge border where we stayed the night. Another friend of Joey's came along for the journey, a very interesting man who is a writer, and gave me some great advice towards my future writing career... Let's hope I can take this somewhere one day, as I love writing! (Can you tell?!) (Jabber, jabber, jabber!) We proceeded to drink again (I did try avoid it) but... pheuw, it is a long journey... So, why not! Hard core here I come!

We arrived in Bulawayo at about 4pm on Saturday, and rushed about getting ready to make it to the venue by 5pm. What an amazing evening, unbelievably sad, but wow, just amazing. There were hundreds of people, no idea exactly how many, but a lot. It was at Joey's old high school in the hall, and there were people inside, outside, constantly arriving. The family were unbelievably strong in the such sad circumstances. I think the fact that they could see just how many lives Joey touched, helped give them some inner strength, that they may not have had before. The speeches began later on in the evening and were so touching, I do not think there was a dry eye in the house. Joey's twin sisters, who are just beautiful girls, gave the cutest, happiest speech I have heard in a long time. Two of his friends spoke, his dad and a family friend. The words touched everyone and made us all remember just how wonderful Joey actually was. There was a beautiful DVD shown with photos and video clips going right back to his childhood and playing some of his favourite music. What a crazy, fun loving boy he was! He just LOVED life! xx

Later on in the evening, the Bulawayo fire crew had organised a fire show as a tribute to Joe. (We do this fire dancing thing, with ropes and poles – it is called 'poi' and I have done it now for over seven years.) I actually got Joe started a few years ago, when I was doing a show out at a Dam just outside Bulawayo. He asked if he could have a go, and I said 'of course, but not while they are on fire!' Oh no... That was not what he wanted! You see, Joey was one of those people that was all or nothing. He never did anything in half measures. Not even one thing. He made me light them and off he went! Bashing himself, burning himself, dirtying his clothes, but he was off! There was no stopping him, and about four weeks ago we did a show together, the first one I have ever done with him since then. He was amazing! I was so proud...

Luckily I was able to join in the show at such short notice, the guys had chosen one of Joey's favourite songs, a beautiful dance song, with beautiful words and a lovely tune. I will try and find out the name of it, or upload the video when I get a chance. We started by lighting Joey's poi and leaving them hanging up and burning for him and for everyone, then we began. There were just four of us, and the song lasted about 8mins. Everyone cheered and as the song got faster and faster, the energy was amazing. I felt Joey there with us, 100%. At the end we all blew his poi out at the same time and wished we weren't saying goodbye... I bet you he is up in heaven entertaining all the angels...

Joey's friends James and Kerry had brought with them from South Africa, these beautiful Chinese lanterns which everyone had signed and his family, close friends and the fire crew set alight. 'Every time we touch I get this feeling, every time we kiss I reach for the sky,' was playing as they finally took flight... It was the most beautiful, emotional thing, and such an awesome way to say 'goodbye for now,' to our beautiful Jo Jo... Everyone howled like dogs as they took off... It was a trade mark Joey sound! He was always a howler to get the party going! It was the most beautiful evening, we danced, and partied and laughed, and did just what Joey would have wanted us to do! I hope that when my time comes to leave this world, that I have something like that. I would want a happy event, not a sad one. A joyous one, with my fire crew... Even if we are all in our eighties! I sure hope we can still dance with fire when we are that age!!! This has been a pure example as to how to say goodbye to someone we love. We should not ever be sad and somber, we should celebrate the lives of those we loved. I think anyone would want that.

This morning before my flight, I ran into his folks house to give them one last hug. What a beautiful family, we hugged and shed a few tears, but I tell you what... They had a unique, selfless, fabulous son, and I hope that they will think of the happy times, and be blessed that he came into their lives. Even if it wasn't for long enough. Joey is needed somewhere, and that is why he went. He has also taught us to love more, to care more, to think about others more, and to appreciate every little thing. New friendships have been made this weekend, so many things have happened that would never have happened, I can just imagine. There is a reason why he left us, and with time, we may all figure that out more and more. We will miss him so, but we will never forget him, we will always love him, and he has most certainly changed everyone's lives whom he knew for the better. I have no doubt about that.

My friend, fly high, watch over us, we shall miss you, but we will meet again... xxx