29th April 2010

I had a lovely weekend away.

As lovely as it could have been I suppose... I made some really big mistakes when I was younger and the effects are a lot worse now than they would have been if I had admitted to them when I was younger. You live and you learn I guess. I certainly have learned...

One of my beautiful friends got married this weekend in Durban. It was a beautiful wedding. She is an amazing girl and has married an amazing guy. What more could she ask for? I was honoured to be there to share her special day. I felt a little spare a lot of the time as I didn't really fit in anymore, but I would have been so sad had I missed it. Things change all of the time, people change, feelings change, friendships change, but love never leaves. Things just change that's all. I will get used to this as time goes on, I know that.

I spent a lot of the time when I was not involved with wedding activities with an amazing lady called Linda. A long lost friend but a true friend and a very special lady. We are so similar in so many ways but have taken such different paths, I think spending time together was good for both of us in very different ways. Thank you darling for a lovely weekend.

Marty and I went off on Monday and enjoyed our B&B voucher in Hout Bay. Gorgeous place called 'Le Marais.' Very french country but gorgeously modern rooms! Loved it and highly recommend it. This weekend has made me realise that I must love the things that I have and hold on to the things I do not want to lose. I am trying to be a better girlfriend and person in every way that I can...

Started a so-called health kick yesterday, it's a 28 day plan, so lets see how I get on... Two years ago I felt more amazing than I ever did before, and somehow I have just let myself slide. It is time I sort myself out, get in shape, feel more confident, not feel so old! I hate feeling as though I am getting old... I feel all panicked at the thought, I am not ready to be a mom, and a wife, and all that jazz... Not just yet, can I please just put it off for another couple of years... Please!?

So the painting in the photo is what I painted for my friends for their wedding present. Pop art. (The other one is Linda & the other, the girls at the hen night!) They loved it (they said they did!) And I hopefully have three more orders, so fingers crossed! I totally enjoyed painting it for them, and hope that I can do more stuff like that! I have only finally today had my inspiration for the order that I am doing for friends in Joburg. It has taken me a while to think of something original and I just had a creative brain wave today, so let's just hope that they love it. I am going to risk it and do it without telling them! Eeek! 2.3m x 1.7m (just a small picture then!?)

Have an interview tomorrow, really hoping it goes well. I am always busy, but I definitely need to bring in some cash soon. Have a few more bookings for 'Afrodizzyacts' but I feel bad hanging at home a lot of the time, and staring at a computer screen for hours on end does get a bit much. Need some activity in my life! Will let you know how it goes.

Time for bed now. Hope all is well in the big wide world. Send some comments my way about the painting! x

20th April 2010

Hello everybody... Hope you all had a good weekend... I am once again in bed pretty early. Am so tired at the moment, think I spend far too much time on the computer everyday and it drains me so much! The problem is, I do so much work, and scouting for work, and finding connections that if I don't go on and I am not working, I feel as though I am being lazy! It is a no win situation!

I am getting to the stage where I feel as though my brain is going to pop! I used to be like this in London, and things changed when I left and I felt a lot less stressed. Now for some reason I think the stress is slowly making its way back! I think I am just trying to do so many things, and don't have enough time you know?!

I am firstly trying to promote my new company 'AFRODIZZYACTS' which of course really needs a website, but I cannot afford to do that right now. I attempted to start making my own one on iweb, which doesn't look too bad, but I reckon it could be done better. I have a lovely friend in Joburg who has offered to help me, which is really kind, but I feel a bit bad asking as I know he is busy too. I then have to get all the information, pictures etc ready to send through to him so we can actually start, so that will be at least a day or two of a mission. I am constantly trying to promote Marty and myself in every way possible, contacting Event Companies, Night Clubs, Restaurants, Bars, Shopping Centres, Hotels, Promotional Agencies - have so many more to get hold of, I haven't even done a quarter of what I am aiming to do. I have however set up a page on facebook, so do have a search for 'Afrodizzyacts' on there and you will be able to see some more pics.

I would also like to get involved in Children's Parties, as we are giant clowns on stilts, I do face painting, teach art to children, and I am sure we could help with the party planning too. As well as hopefully getting some extra baby sitting jobs on the side to make some extra cash, seeing as I do not have a full-time job! We did land a publication in a children's magazine which is being published in May, so fingers crossed that goes well.

I am trying to paint as much as I can too, and trying to find contacts here in Cape Town who would sell some of my art. This is seeming to be a lot harder than it was in London. I have done four paintings so far, and need to spend a day googling every art gallery in Cape Town and sending off my pictures in the hope that one of them at least will put them up for sale. I have a commission of a massive 2.3m x 1.7m painting for friends in Joburg and I am looking forward to doing that. Obviously I will not charge the normal rate as they are mates, but hope to make a little profit anyhow. That is my mission for the month of May. I love painting, and want to continue, but until I find an outlet it is kind of silly filling the flat up with hundreds of brightly coloured crazy paintings!

Oh! I must tell you the good news though! After three weeks of Marty & I sleeping in a single bed, our gorgeous double bed arrived today, and our even more gorgeous charcoal corner couch! The only trouble being the old furniture is still here, once again, fingers crossed that all gets collected tomorrow morning! Then it is just the wait for some money, so we can have some custom made cupboards made (not to worry, have investigated, they are all reasonably priced! If not cheaper than the shops!) We are just getting some white cupboards made for the lounge for all the stilts, fancy dress stuff, art stuff, extra katundoo (african word for junk!) and all my bloody clothes!!! Aaaah!!! (Note... hoarder...Aaah!) We are making a book shelf too and a smaller cupboard for our bedroom.

Okay so the next thing is, the photography world. I still love my photography and I am keen to set up my own wedding photography business but that is a whole other ball game! I know I can do it, and that I am capable, but this is the trouble when you do so many things! It is really good money, but with all the other stuff going on in my life, I just don't seem to be able to focus on that fully. I must try a bit harder in this area though. I went on a book binding course last weekend and very proudly made a beautiful book out of recycled paper which could be a photo album, diary, or anything of the sort. So I could take the pictures, edit the pictures, make the album and have a whole package. Then comes the problem that I need to buy a new flash gun, photoshop for my Apple ($$$ lots of bucks,) add more to my non-existant website, gain some more confidence and make a name for myself... Lots to do hey!?

Marty and I are hopefully doing an advert next week which should be decent money, and then there are a couple more things bubbling for May. Then of course it is the World Cup! Lets hope all that goes well. I don't suppose I will be able to focus on anything permanent or too serious until all that is over, but by then I may pop to London for a while, so crikey, think this year is just going to be a crazy, higgledy piggeldy year! Let's just hope it is loads and loads of fun and that we do end up making some decent money!

I know there must be at least another seven thousand things that I am doing that keeps me busy, and my overloaded mind working on high speed! Trying to exercise, eat healthier (am getting rather porky me thinks!) Writing this blog, trying to keep in touch with all my friends & family, possibly becoming a comedian's right hand man, organising cupboards to be built, organising my crazy props to be built, looking for jobs, advertising myself in every area I can think of (that is relevant to me of course!) Trying to keep on top of the flat in London, and hope that is running smoothly, day dreaming about all the great places I still want to go and see, and how I am going to do it!? Trying to be as good at this girlfriend thing as I can be. Washing, cleaning, tidying, organising, cooking, shopping, trying to stop smoking, watching my two favourite TV shows each week (and not missing them by planning other stuff which I always seem to do!) Looking out for cool fun stuff that is happening in Cape Town, buying tickets, not feeling as though I am missing London... Trying to save money as I have so many things I still need to buy for this flat, for my company... Man... There is so much crap that just swirls around my head! I am not even reading enough, and that was the one thing I was hoping to do more in Africa, I never had time in London. At least I can say that I am a go-getter, and let's just hope that one day I will land my big break! Perhaps then I will calm down a little?!

I have attached pics from our job on Saturday... Human Tables... great fun, but my design is 100 times better... I nearly broke my back! Thank goodness I have an hourly rate! Ciao for now! The crazy woman!

16th April 2010

Pheuw.... Who is a tired girl? Me.... Pheuwee...... snore... snore...!!!

Went to bed far too late and got up far too early! So now I am just tucked in my bed catching up on all the internet business. Not to worry it is not all play, I work on here too! (I do!)

Marty and I were grabbed by a gay nun on Friday night who was outside of a bar in Long Street called Julep! Marty tried to escape but I was intrigued. Turns out this nun is a comedian, who would have guessed? (Note of sarcasm there! x) Sister Mary James is the name, and he is hilarious. We were convinced into buying two tickets for his show which was last Monday, and of course, me being the BIGGEST sucker in the world when it comes to someone selling stuff, we got two tickets! Marty was only slightly touched up, bum, thighs, tummy, biceps, nothing seriously major! Much to my amusement and his panic, and fear!!! Hee hee!!! I am a terrible girlfriend! Like when we are walking around a really gay area, I make him walk in front of me, just to see who checks him out... Hilarious stuff!!! It is only because he is so gorgeous, it is actually a compliment! xx

So basically we popped down to the show, which was great, and I shall do my best to promote it. I love spur of the minute things, and I love doing new and completely random things. It is the best way to live, and the best way to learn. We had a great evening, and needless to say Marty and I were picked on the most, I was called up to sing 'your the one that I want, ooh ooh ooh honey!' With ol' Sister Mary James! Funny, funny, funny! At the end of the evening a few of us went and had some sushi and chinese... (ooooh I am hungry...) And I was asked whether or not I would be interested in becoming the hilarious gay nun's protege! (sp?)

Me? A comedian, well I never!? I would like to think that I am quite funny and that my accents are rather good, but it is always when I am pissed! Sober stuff... No no no!!! Although, you never say never do you?! I didn't think I could act, and I got the part in a play called 'Scrubbers' and I succeeded in learning all the lines for a 90 minute play! I never thought I could do that, or not be shy doing something like that but I did it... So you know what?! I am going to give this comedian protege thing a go! We have rehearsals on Sunday... Eeek!

We won an auction for a dinner, bed & breakfast at a hotel in Hout Bay worth R1500, and we got it for R350, so very chuffed, we need a little romantic break! It will be lovely! Marty hasn't even been to Hout Bay yet! Think my beady eyes at everyone else bidding did the trick!!! Ha ha!!!

Busy old week it has been, did a very cool thing this week, but have to wait a couple weeks before I can say what it is... Marty and I are working on Saturday at the Roundhouse in Camps Bay tomorrow as human tables! Looking forward to it! We are doing an advert on the 2nd of May on stilts and then have very exciting things happening for the World Cup. Won't spill the beans just yet as I do not want to jinx it, but lets just say all you folk around the world, look out for us on TV!!! Woo hoo!!!!

Off to Durban next week for one of my beautiful friend's weddings, can't wait and then the month of May is dedicated to painting a HUGE painting (2.3m x 1.7m) for some Joburgites! So that shall be a big job, but very exciting!

Hope you all have a fabulous weekend. Catch you all soon. Mwah xx

Pictures:-

Marty & I doing a granny & grandpa act at Vortex, just outside Cape Town.

Me doing fire at the Afrikadabra party a few weeks ago at the Castle here in Cape Town.

Human Table... Love it!

Marty & I being human statues at a birthday party at the Butterfly Studios here in Cape Town.

Marty & Sister Mary James!!!

9th April 2010

Man.......

Sometimes I think that we were actually born to be on our own.... I find it so difficult trying to share my life with someone else?! How come so many people make relationships and marriages and all that jazz look so easy?! It is such a crazy thing?!

I have a wonderful boyfriend and I love him to bits, but gosh.... I find this stuff all just too much sometimes!

Perhaps we are all actually just mean't to be single, and have lots of friends rather than picking that one person, and saying, okay your it mate!? Why is it like this?! With all my little OCDness, my bossiness and my control freakness, I seriously think I am mean't to be alone... I don't know how or why Marty or anyone in particular wants to put up with all my nonsense sometimes... I really think I would be better off alone.... I could just be friends with everyone that way and then life would be swell...

Don't get me wrong though, I am not saying it in a sad and miserable way... I am just trying to grasp all this relationship stuff. I have had only one serious relationship in the past I would say. Although when I look back now, I guess I was still young and didn't know anything different. I now live with my boyfriend, do almost everything with him, have to deal with every little thing that comes with all this malarky... Its nuts! He is not me, and I am not him, so how do you make it work?!

I like to have things done how I like them done. I am right in everything that I decide to do. (Most of the time!) I don't want anyone telling me what to do. I just want to get on with the things I want to get on with. How do you fit someone else in, and their needs, and then my needs, and that other thing called 'our' needs... It really is a lot of work! It is not an easy thing I tell you....

Once again, I am absolutely not dissing Marty one bit, I am just trying to understand the whole concept of relationships, why we have them, what the point is... etc etc...

It is times like these that I just wish I knew all the answers, what the point of everything is you know?! I have done some stupid, stupid stuff in my life so far, and I am not even really old yet am I?! How have I managed to do such stupid things? Why didn't I ever think about the consequences? What on earth did I benefit from any of it?! I have no idea... I honestly don't.... I just have no idea about a lot of stuff a lot of the time.

I hope there are other people out there who feel the same? I hope it is not just me and my slight madness that makes me think about things like this... I have been told several times that I think about stuff too much, but I can't help that! How do you stop your mind thinking about things?! I persevere with everything... I am happy most of the time... I have a wonderful boyfriend who does adore me... I adore him too.... I like Cape Town... I miss London... I hope that this is the correct path I have chosen.... I wish I was still 22 and not nearly 29..... I wish I had all the time in the world.... I wish I didn't have to get old... I wish wrinkles never existed... I wish food wasn't fattening... I wish I had pockets of money... I wish so many things.... But mainly I wish that I could get my head together and understand all this love & life business.....

Perhaps then I would be okay?

Perhaps there are people out there who think about stuff just the way I do?

Perhaps I should stop thinking about stuff as much as I do?

What do you reckon?

1st April 2010

I cannot believe how much stuff I have... It is ridiculous! I am a proper hoarder... (Hope that is how you spell it?!)

I shipped 25 boxes from London... 25!!! Isn't that the most absurdly ridiculous thing you have ever heard?! For goodness sakes, I am only 28... I have seven million pairs of shoes, clothes, clothes, clothes, some I haven't even worn for years... I have jewellery, earrings, bracelets, hats, socks, scarves, head bands, bra's, underwear, stockings... More than enough for at least 20 people!

I have magnets, magnets, magnets (I love my magnets though!) I have a magnet from every single place I have been, but not just the country magnets, even the state magnets...

Zimbabwe, South Africa, Botswana, Mozambique, Zambia, Egypt, Jordan, Dubai, Israel, South Korea, Australia - Perth - Sydney -Melbourne - Great Ocean Road, Jamaica, America - Las Vegas - Phoenix - New York, England (won't even name all the England ones as that is just ridiculous!) Scotland, Ireland, Switzerland, Germany, Brussels, France, Czech Republic, Hungary, Spain - Madrid - Ibiza - Menorca -Majorca, Canary Islands - Tenerife - Gran Caneria, Italy - Venice - Florence - Bologna - Pisa, Greece - Athens - Ios - Paros - Naxos - Spetses - Mykonos, Portugal... That is all I can remember now! Think that is it?!

(Perhaps I sound like I am showing off a bit, but it is also nice for me to write it all down and see what I have done!) Ooooooh... That is why I miss being in London! It is so easy to pop to Europe you know?! Guess I can now do the African countries! I still haven't been to Namibia and that is pretty close to Cape Town. There is this huge festival in Tanzania in August which hopefully we will work at?! That would be awesome! I would also like to go to Malawi... It is mean't to be gorgeous... There is definitely lots to do here, we just need to save some money now hey?!

Back to the crazy hoarding.... Now that I am pretty much a professional performer (yay!) I have cupboards full of fancy dress stuff, head pieces, wigs, masks, eye-lashes, feathers (and more feathers,) accessories, bags of stilt pants, angel wings, butterfly wings, belts, crazy cat-suits... It is like a bloody fancy dress shop in our apartment at the moment!

We bought a couch and a bed last week which have not yet arrived. I cannot wait to get rid of all this old mismatching furniture... I will feel so much happier! Although it does not end there because I need LOTS of cupboard space, so cannot wait till we can afford it all. We will have to have a giant cupboard and book shelf in the lounge for extra storage! I feel as though we are just staying in this apartment, but it is not yet ours you know?!

Then there is the painting that I do, the paint, the glitter, the stones, the glue, the paintbrushes, the canvas, the art books, the spray paint... That takes up a WHOLE lot of space, and needless to say we have my paintings plonked all over the house!

You don't even want me to get started on the books.... Aaaaaah! I swear I could start my own library... That is what happens when you work in publishing houses... I worked at two during my stay in London, so cheap books.... Therefore.... Natalie goes completely OVERBOARD! I tried to calculate the other day just how long it would take for me to read all my books, it would be years and years... And that was working on an average read, when sometimes I don't read for months! Too busy doing other stuff to actually relax and read... I really need to sort out my time management....

Then of course, there are the African sculptures, masks, drums, chairs... I already have more than enough here, and I left most of it in London! I guess you could say that I am proud to be an African, but man oh man, there is no need! I live in Africa again now, so perhaps I need to stop that collection....

I started collecting plates as well as magnets (and badges - for my backpack) when I first started travelling, but luckily stopped that a few countries ago... I think that is my mothers fault... She has plates on her wall and I guess I thought I could do the same, but for goodness sake it is not necessary! Magnets are more than enough!

Why am I like this I wonder?! I hate it! It stresses me out, it makes me feel clogged down you know?! It is a huge responsibility and I need to sort myself out soon, or else I will be on one of the 'Clean your house' shows.... Please NO!!! I honestly think I have OCD you know?! I am like that with my food too?! I hate people eating my food, using my things, making mess, I am very pedantic with all most everything... It is ANNOYING!!! Does anyone have any advice for me?! I could honestly do with some right now... We do not have enough space in our new apartment, and I need to learn how to get rid of things, and break down the clutter in my life, because I tell you what, I am sure I will be happier?!

Looking forward to the tips peeps! Come on... Get busy!

xx Happy Easter for this weekend too! xx